People never cease to amaze me, I could sit and watch them for hours. One of my favorite times to watch people is in traffic, everything else just fades away and the road belongs to them. It’s funny to watch people get so upset because they can’t get that one extra car length closer to traffic because some inconsiderate driver in front of them doesn’t recognize their ownership of the motorways. My favorite type of people to observe on the expressways however are the drivers who have absolutely no control over the speed of their car, and they have no idea that it’s them with the problem. They get so angry. Let me explain.

While driving along the expressway you come up to a vehicle that is moving substantially slower than you so, as you would normally do, you pass him. You drive along seeing him getting smaller and smaller in your rear view mirror. After a few minutes you look into your mirror only to see him getting bigger and bigger, he’s gaining on you, fairly quickly to boot. He gets in the passing lane and passes you with fervor, and you watch as he gets smaller and smaller in front of you and you think to yourself “good now he can go flush out any speed traps.” But again, as if he’s on some kind of bungee chord that is keeping him anchored to your car, you see him in the near distance getting bigger and bigger until yet again you pass him. Now it’s getting funny, and you exclaim to your wife how ridiculous this whole scenario is. As you look into your mirror lo and behold, there he is again coming up behind you, only this time he is stuck there by traffic in the passing lane. There isn’t even enough distance between your vehicles to mask the redness on his face as he bellows out expletives that you are thankful your wife and young son can’t hear. He seems cranky that you are impeding his progress and that you would have the audacity to get in front of him and purposefully slow down to do so. Finally he gets to pass you and you see the angry look on his face as he passes and you just wish there was some way that you could communicate with him to let him know that “hey moron, I’ve been on cruise control the whole time, you might consider checking your speedometer every once in a while.” Oh well, I’ll be seeing him again, maybe by then I’ll figure out a way to suggest that he find a way to regulate his speed.

Remember to drive safe, I’ll be needing that road later.