Well, in my relentless and never ending search for the perfect, unique idea I think I have finally found it. I am training gummy worms. It’s actually coming along quite well, as I already have them trained to play dead in unison. I call my new act “Synchronized Necrosis” and will be taking my act on the road soon. Look for us in a town near you.
I’m hoping to retire off of this, this is my big ticket out of here. People are going to come out in droves, why, I’m expecting tens of people in the first year alone.
Come one come all, prepare yourselves to be mystified, horrified, stupified, and disgustified by the spectacle of Joshua Swanagon and his Gummies, as they enthrall you with their tantalizing Dance Of Death.
*Disclaimer*
By mystified, horrified, stupified, and disgustified we really mean mildly amuzed, potentially bewildered.
By “tantalizing Dance Of Death” we really mean they play dead.
Due to the nature of this act, being a performance that you cannot unsee, there will be no refunds issued after witnessing “the spectacle” so don’t ask.
Void where prohibited by law, common sense and better judgment.